Saturday, December 21st, 2024
It took me longer than I had planned, but I think that I am officially caught up
on the website once againI (Minus one picture of a Disney popcorn bucket that I
will add soon, once I get a good picture of it.) I am trying my best to keep up with
things, but things have been challenging personally lately, and I am fighting
myself a lot right now, flipping my feelings back and forth way too much. I am
trying, however, and that is a step in the right direction!
There are a few additions to the site this time around, including the latest
soccer games for Jayden's Riverview Sharks soccer team. I have also added
pictures from Jayden's 18th birthday party with her friends, which she had at
home the night after her birthday. The final two additions to the site are
Disney related, first a few of my newest popcorn buckets, and also pictures from
a trip that I took with Grandma Terry and Aunt Erica in December. Feel free to
check them all out on the Current Events page!
If it has been
a while since your last visit to our site, please check out the Update List page
to see what you may have missed out on! This page contains a
chronological listing of all of the updates that have been made this year.
As always, please enjoy the site and come back often. Thanks for visiting!
I had been using this space to share some feelings about my personal life and
the issues I am dealing with, but I am going to stop that. I just no longer see
any point in it any more, as I am comfortable with what is happening at this
point in time. I'm not happy about it, and I still wouldn't choose it, but
again, I accept it and will deal with it the best that I can. Thank you for
letting me vent!
Saturday, November 30th, 2024
I think I am officially caught up! I am trying my best to keep up with
things, but life has a way of being cruel from time to time, and I am fighting
myself a lot right now.
Today I have one addition to the site, as well as several updates from pages
that I added last time. The new addition this time around is for Jayden, as she
participated in her schools powderpuff game on the 20th, but I forgot to add it
last time. I have also added all of the recaps and captions for the rest of
Jayden's soccer games - both high school and club games. I have also recapped
and captioned the two incomplete Disney trips that I added to the site last time
around.
If it has been
a while since your last visit to our site, please check out the Update List page
to see what you may have missed out on! This page contains a
chronological listing of all of the updates that have been made this year.
As always, please enjoy the site and come back often. Thanks for visiting!
"It hurts to know you're happy, yeah, it hurts that you
moved on"
"It's like we never happened, was it just a lie?
If what we had was real, how could you be fine?
'Cause I'm not fine at all"
"And the dreams you left behind, you didn't need them
Like every single wish we ever made
I wish that I could wake up with amnesia
And forget about the stupid little things
Like the way it felt to fall asleep next to you
And the memories I never can escape
'Cause I'm not fine at all"
- Amnesia by 5 Seconds of Summer
Since nobody really reads this site, I am going to utilize this space to dump
some of my feelings, since I really don't have anybody that I can turn to to
discuss it.
Last night sucked. I literally bawled for a good 30 minutes straight.
Not a little crying, but bawling like I have never done. Maybe not since
my grandparents passed away, anyway.
The worst part is that I am not sure why. Well, I know why. It was a
realization that I miss my best friend dearly. I miss talking to my best
friend, listening to my best friend, holding my best friends hand,
sharing meals with my best friend, hugging and cuddling my best friend,
holding my best friend in my arms as I felt them drift further and
further into their sleep, dreaming about the future with my best friend. Combine that with my
loneliness now, and what is certain to be loneliness for the remainder
of my future, and it just became too much.
And though I try to convince myself that we could never be best
friends again, the reality is that I would forgive everything in a
heartbeat just to have that with them once again.
I prayed for the pain to end, but I woke up this morning…
Monday, November 25th, 2024
Once again I am late in getting the website updated. I am trying my best,
but life has been a tad overwhelming for me lately.
This update will center around adding the pages and pictures from recent
events as I work my way through the recaps and picture captions. New additions to
the website today include the addition of pictures from my trips to Walt Disney
World in October and November, as well as several of Jayden's high school and
club soccer games. I will circle back around and wrap up the updates soon.
"Sick of this life, not that you'd care
I'm not the only one with whom these feelings, I share
Nobody understands quite why we're here
We're searching for answers that never appear"
- Dead Horse by Guns N' Roses
Since nobody really reads this site, I am going to utilize this space to dump
some of my feelings, since I really don't have anybody that I can turn to to
discuss it.
30 years. You know and love somebody for 30+ years. See them, talk to them,
touch them, share intimate hopes, dreams, moments, mundane stuff too
virtually every day. Everything you have, closer than family. Then, one day, it's over. No
communication. No concern. Not a care in the world. Just, nothing. Like
I meant to them.
At least I know how little I truly meant to them over the years. I
find it amazing just how little you can mean to somebody who truly meant
the world to you for so long. Not even allowed to show concern over
them. This is how I know I'm better off now. It’s amazing just how
easily you're forgotten, but not forgiven.
I tried. I tried my very best. I failed. Again and again. Now there
is no need to try any longer. It's time to accept my failure and live
with it for the remainder of my life. Alone.
The feeling of human body contact (from holding hands, to kissing, to
cuddling, to sex) is one of the most incredible feelings one can
experience. I don’t find joy or excitement in having sex with random
people, but life is so much better with love, sex, and the beauty of
having someone that cares about you, and also giving that care back to
someone.
I guess that ship has sailed…
If it has been
a while since your last visit to our site, please check out the Update List page
to see what you may have missed out on! This page contains a
chronological listing of all of the updates that have been made this year.
As always, please enjoy the site and come back often. Thanks for visiting!
Thursday, November 14th, 2024
Once again there has been a delay between my updates. I am trying my best,
but life has a way of being overwhelming from time to time.
If you visited the website recently, you may have read that Tara and I are no
longer together and in the process of a divorce. I am not at liberty to discuss it, but know that it has been
difficult for me. With each passing day I am learning that it is for the best
for me, even if I am not looking forward to the years of loneliness that lie
ahead. This will be the last I mention this on the website, and I appreciate the
respect of my privacy during this trying time.
This update primarily involves the
captions and game recaps of the events that I missed last time. New additions to
the website include the addition of pictures from our time enduring Hurricane
Milton, our short-lived time with a pet squirrel, as well as more events for
Jayden - her final homecoming dance, her senior pictures at the studio for the
school, and her high school soccer games.
"Who told you you were hard to love? (Hard to love)
Who told you you weren't good enough? (Good enough)
Who broke your heart and made you believe
That you won't be anything without her? (They better watch their back)"
- More Than Enough Song by Sarah Reeves
Sunday, November 10th, 2024
Sorry for the delay between updates. I am trying my best, but a lot has gone
on in the time since I was able to last post an update.
The first thing you may have noticed is the new name of the website. Tara of
RodandTara has decided that she is no longer happy in the marriage, so we are
working towards a (hopefully) amicable divorce. Not exactly the choice I would
have made, but I really wasn't given any other option - it was choice A,
divorce, or choice B, divorce. I won't be eliminating her presence from the
website, but you will notice a lot less of her moving forward.
I have added a bunch of pictures from Jayden's Tampa Dynamo games, but the
captions and game recaps are still to come. I also have other events that I
haven't even gotten around to adding to the site, including two of her Riverview
Lady Sharks high school games from this past week. Hopefully I will be able to
keep working on them and get myself caught up soon. Unfortunately for me, sleep
and motivation have been lacking lately.
"Think I forgot how to be happy
Something I'm not, but something I can be
Something I wait for
Something I'm made for"
- What Was I Made For? Song by Billie Eilish
If it has been
a while since your last visit to our site, please check out the Update List page
to see what you may have missed out on! This page contains a
chronological listing of all of the updates that have been made this year.
As always, please enjoy the site and come back often. Thanks for visiting!
Saturday, September 28th, 2024
With today's soccer game postponed due to field conditions (thanks Hurricane
Helene!), this update only consists of Jayden's most recent soccer scrimmage.
Follow the Update! icons to find the latest event. Until next time!
Saturday, September 21st, 2024
Although later than I hoped, I finally have Jayden's second soccer game of
the club season added to the site. Head on over to Jayden's page under Current
Events to see the latest. Until next time!
Wednesday, September 11th, 2024
Soccer season has begun, so I am going to do my best to keep things up to
date (even though I don't have a lot faith in myself in being able to do so).
Today I have two updates - one trip to Disney with my parents on September 6th,
and Jayden's first Tampa Dynamo soccer game on September 8th. Head on over to
the Current Events page for the latest!
Wednesday, September 4th, 2024
Once again, it has been a while since I last updated the site, and I have a few additions
to share with you this time around. Because it has been so long, and because I
have been working so hard to catch up, I am going to skip a big recap of the
updates here and I will just send you to the Update List page below for the
updates this time.
Friday, June 28th, 2024
It has been a while since I last updated the site, and I have a few additions
to share with you this time around. Up first, we went on some college tours for
Jayden while in Michigan, and I have shared my photos from those tours on
Jayden's Current Events page.
We also made a couple of visits to Walt Disney World for the Tiana's Bayou
Adventure Passholder previews. You can read about our trips by
going to the Current Events page and clicking on Walt Disney World.
Wednesday, May 29th, 2024
Just one update this time around, thanks to another visit to Walt Disney
World. On May 19th, Tara, Samantha, Jayden and I headed over to Epcot to spend
the day together. Click on the Current Events link above or below, then Walt
Disney World, and finally May 19th to see and read about our latest trip.
Wednesday, May 15th, 2024
Just one update this time around, thanks to another visit to Walt Disney
World. On May 4th Jayden and I headed over to the Magic Kingdom to meet up with
Grandma Terry, Uncle Steven, Aunt Julie, my cousin Dana as well as kids Abby,
Jacob, and Juliana. Click on the Current Events link above or below, then Walt
Disney World, and finally May 4th to see and read about our latest trip.
Monday, April 29th, 2024
It has been nearly two months since I last posted any updates, though not
entirely due to not having anything to post. We took what will probably be our
last "family" trip to Walt Disney World in March, as Drew wrapped up his first
co-op term of work for school, and Jayden was on spring break. I say "family"
because Tyler was unable to join us from Michigan, and Samantha was only able to
meet up with us for one day.
With all that being said, I finally managed to sit down and get the pages for
our visit updated. You can check out the pictures from our trip by going to the
Current Events page and then following the Update! and New! icons until you get
to the Spring Break link on the Walt Disney World page.
Friday, February 24th, 2024
Just a quick note to myself to remind myself of what was added to the website
over the course of the past month since my last update...
Two updates this time around, both from Jayden's activities. Up first was a
friends birthday party on February 17th, followed by the high school soccer
banquet on February 22nd. You can find both new pages on Jayden's Current Events
page.
Thursday, February 15th, 2024
Just a quick note to myself to remind myself of what was added to the website
over the course of the past month since my last update...
The additions start with a trip to Walt Disney World that Jayden and I took
with Grandma Terry and Uncle Steven. A second trip took place later, when Tara &
I went on my birthday. You can find both of these visits by going to the Current
Events page and clicking on the Walt Disney World link. Jay and her Riverview
Lady Sharks high school soccer team wrapped up their time on the field this
season with their final game, a district playoff game on January 24th. She and
her Tampa Dynamo soccer teammates also participated in the Brandon Cup soccer
tournament over the weekend of January 26th-28th (though she didn't get to
finish the tournament due to a sprained ankle that has kept her out of action
for the past few weeks). You can find all of her soccer updates by going to the
Jayden Current Events page and following both of the respective team links.
Friday, January 19th, 2024
A belated Happy New Year to all of our visitors (which admittedly probably
isn't anyone but me)! I hope that you had an amazing 2023 and that 2024 is off
to a great start.
We have been busy since my last update over a month ago. Tara, Tyler, Rose,
and Drew came to town to celebrate Christmas with us, which you can see by going
to both the 2023 Past Events page as well as the Current Events page (at least
for a few updates, anyway). While they were here, we also visited the Florida
Botanical Gardens in Largo and the Manatee Viewing Center in Apollo Beach. You
will find those on the 2023 Past Events page and the Current Events page as
well. Moving into 2024's events, we have two games for Jayden's Tampa Dynamo
soccer team, as well as a single game for her Riverview Lady Sharks high school
soccer team. You can see those updates by following the Jayden link on the
Current Events page.
If it has been
a while since your last visit to our site, please check out the Update List page
to see what you may have missed out on! This page contains a
chronological listing of all of the updates that have been made this year.
As always, please enjoy the site and come back often. Thanks for visiting!
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